


I Can’t Blame Them

by AtemLePharaoh



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Bad Writing, Blood, Cliffhangers, Emotional Manipulation, Flashbacks, Gaslighting, Ghostbur, Hurt/Comfort, I will literally fucking break your kneecaps, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Its like Minecraft but with more realistic things people wise, Manipulative Relationship, Minecraft is real life, Not actually relationship just friendship, Oh ho ho this is gonna be painful, Panic Attacks, Philza is their dad, Piglin Hybrid Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rated M for depictions of gore, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Technoblade Has Anger Issues (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade Has Braided Hair (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade being a good brother, Toby Smith | Tubbo Has Horns, Tommy has wings, Tommy-centric, Tommy/Tubbo shippers be GONE FUCKERS, TommyInnit Has ADHD (Video Blogging RPF), Violence, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, and other things like that, anyway, but no one knew because he hid them, dream is a little bitch, just his character tho, like they aren’t block people, so proceed with caution I guess, totally not me projecting onto tommy, we love to see it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:01:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28414326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AtemLePharaoh/pseuds/AtemLePharaoh
Summary: || This is an AU (kind of) where Tubbo decides to visit Tommy earlier than i the cannon streams ||Tommy looks out across the ruins and shambles of a place he used to call home.He shakes his head.This was never his home. He never had a home after he had been exiled, by none other than his best friend.He made his friend upset.He hurt his only friend.so Dream blew it all up.“But that’s okay, i deserve it”***DISCONTIUNED***
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit
Comments: 21
Kudos: 431





	1. Chapter 1: Swan Dive

**Author's Note:**

> So- hi? I’m not sure how this works at all- i’ve used AO3 for a very long time, i just never bothered to make an account. So i have no fucking idea how this formatting works...
> 
> oh shit i just realized i’m not actually using the browser i’m using gmail
> 
> wonderful 
> 
> anyways here take some angst
> 
> sorry if this is ass writing 
> 
> Warnings for the whole fic are in the tags yall, happy angsty read

Tubbo excitedly made his way though the purple-obsidian portal. He was finally going to see Tommy! After all this time- he felt so cowardly and horrible for not visiting earlier, but the brunette was almost jumping up and down with happiness! He was going to see his best friend! Granted- Tubbo had exiled him, but the bee-lover wasn’t thinking about that.

As he stepped into the final portal to get to Logstedshire, he let out an excited squeal. Tubbo felt the teleportation magic tug at him, so he closed his eyes and let the portal do its job.

The president opened his eyes and stepped out of the portal. He scanned his surroundings and-

_What the fuck?_

There was a destroyed portal next to the working one, Logstedshire blown to pieces. Tnret was destroyed, nothing but a figment of imagination. Tubbo slowly walked over to the remains of Tommys home, jaw dropping in shock at the damage. There was nothing left. _Did Tommy do this? Did he blow this all up?!_ The boy stood completely still, contemplating if his friend would have done this. _Tommy may be reckless, but he would never blow up his home!.... Right?_ He shook away the thought, jumping into the crater to examine the remains of Logstedshire. Items were thrown left and right from the explosion, most turned to ash from what looked like lava, but he ignored that. Maybe it was an accident? Tubbo felt dread envelop him, but he didn’t know why, his gut screaming to turn around, to look for the poor boy. _Is he even still here?_ His eyebrows furrowed in frustration, he wanted to come visit the blue eyed boy, but he couldn’t even find him.

So Tubbo looked.

He made his way over to the beach, maybe Tommy was sitting enjoying the sun! The boy skipped past the remains of the tent, pausing for a split second to examine the grave across from the crater.

“Who the heck is Mexican Dream?”.

Tubbo scratched his head, eyes darting from picture to picture, his gaze stopping suddenly at a torn apart picture of a group photo of them all.

The teens’ heart dropped as he remembered.

Tommy must be angry at him.

 _It’s okay!_ Tubbo shook his head and kept on towards the beach. _Tommy would understand why I exiled him! He was a liability, it was either Tommy or another-_ Tubbo stopped short as he got a good view of the beach. It seems there was a party set up here. Smashed cake was sitting abandoned in the middle of the table, dust covering the knocked over chairs that were littering the ground.

Tubbo was flabbergasted by the site. _It looks so... sad._ He frowned, Tommy wasn’t here. The boy rubbed his noise and looked for an area that Tommy might have gone, eyes scanning back over Logstedshire- or... well, the remains of it. There was a- a tower there now? _That wasn’t there before!_ Tubbo raced back over to the crater- surprised (but relieved nonetheless) to see his best friend standing atop a newly built tower. The brunette looked up, eyes shining with confusion and excitement.

“Hey Tommy!”

The blond teen froze at his ex-best friends voice. _What the fuck is **he** doing here?!_ Tubbo cupped his hands over his mouth and shouted as loud as he could.

“What are you doing all the way up there? Be careful, you might fall!”

Tommy turned to meet his eyes, the exiled boys’ eyes shone with tears unshed, pain weaving its way onto his features. Tubbo was still very confused.

“Tommy what are you-“

The brunettes eyes widened.

“Oh.”

_Oh_.

_nononononnoNONONO HE CANT_

Tubbo let out a blood-boiling scream

“TOMMYINNIT DO NOT- PLEASEPLEASEPLEaseplease!” Tubbo ran to the base of the tower, hoping he could claw his way up to his friend in time, but he couldn’t get a solid hold. Instead he dropped to his knees, begging and pleading with Tommy.

“PLEASE COME DOWN I DONT WANT YOU TO DIE- PLEASE TOMMY I-“, Tubbo choked on his tears, breath hitching, and he held onto the base of the tower like a lifeline. Like if he were to let go, Tommy would simply disintegrate to become one with the dirt in the ground.

The boy that was higher up just stared at the groveling president, his eyes dead- cold and unwelcoming. Tubbo noticed they had lost their hopeful shine, and now instead of that brilliant sky blue, his eyes were reduced to a pale, empty grey. Tommys gaze made him look devoid of any emotion now, which made Tubbo look away.

But his voice proved otherwise.

“Tubbo...”, he let out a pained sigh, tugging on the base of his shirt.

“Nobody loves me anymore-“,

the brunettes’ head shot up in surprise.

“-no one came to visit, not even my own father. Ghostbur left, and Dream hasn’t been visiting as often as before-“ Tommy fought back a sob, while Tubbos’ mind was racing. _Why was Dream with him?_ The exiled teen continued after he took a moment to calm himself.

“Dream blew up Logstedshire-”

“He WHAT?!”

Tommys’ eyes widened in fear, he hadn’t meant to say that- but it already slipped out, so he kept talking.

“-but it’s okay! I deserved it! I disobeyed him, i made him upset-“ Tubbo clenched his fists as his friend stared shaking. _Why would he think that?_

“I-“, Tommys’ voice wavered, “I made my best friend, my only friend, upset Tubbo...” . Tears streamed down the ruined teens’ face, but he wiped them away as soon as they fell.

“Only friend...? Tommy- you have us! You have all of-“

“Tubbo, do you remember that line?”

“....”

**_“What?”_ **

“You know, that one line.” Tommy let out a small smile.

Tubbos eyes widened in horror as he realized what Tommy was about to do.

“PLEASE!”

Tommy extended his arm to his forehead in a salute, closing his eyes and smile widening as leaned forwards.

“It was never meant to be.”.

“ _TOMMY NO!”_.

* ~~ _ **CRASH**_~~ *


	2. Chapter 2: Running Home (I laugh alone, at least I stole the show :3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno has anger issues, and Ghostbur comes to him about his worries with Tommy :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OI OI IM BACK BITCHES!!!! HEY THERE!
> 
> There isn’t much to warn about in this chapter, but warnings are in the tags as per usual
> 
> NOW ONWARDS!

Technoblade tapped his foot impatiently, waiting for the gold to smelt in the furnace. He had gone out for some after running down his supply of gapples, oddly enough all by himself. The voices seemed to quite down while he was working respectively, and the blood god was grateful for the lack of noise.

That didn’t mean he wasn’t bored out of his _mind_ though.

_Gods this is taking so long, i’m sO BORED-_

“Hello Techno!”

Technoblade let out a groan. _Not THAT bored_. The piglin hybrid turned his head towards his guest. “Hello Ghostbur.”.

They both stood there awkwardly, cold wind blowing in through the opened door almost blowing out the coals in the furnace.

“I wanted to talk to you about something...”, Ghostbur fiddled with his jacket sleeve nervously, waiting for his brother to reply.

“Can you close the door?”

Ghostbur blinked in confusion. “What?”

The pink haired man stood up swiftly, walking quite aggressively towards the ghost. He then reached through his brother ( _what? he can do that?_ ) and slammed the door shut.

“The door, Wil.”, Techoblade let out an annoyed huff and crossed his arms, sending a glare at Ghostbur. “I’m workin’ here. You’re gonna put out my fire.”.

**_“E“_ **  
**_“Blood for the blood god!”_ **  
**_“Oh it’s Ghostbur!”_ **  
**_“What’s he doing here?”_ **  
**_“Shouldn’t he be with Tommy?”_ **  
**_“e”_ **

_Great_. Techno rubbed his temple, _They’re back._ He looked up at his guest, confused at the frown covering the transparent musicians features. He then proceeded to take out some of his infamous “blue”.

“I’m not Wilbur...”, the ghost said, gripping his blue tighter. “I’m Ghostbur.”.

Techno’s expression softened in understanding. “Oh, ‘msorry Ghostbur.”. They both settled into a silence again, until the younger twin spoke up.

“So what did you come here for...?”

Ghostburs’ eyes lit up, “Oh yes!”, He floated over to Technos’ couch, pretending to take a seat on it. The piglin hybrid internally snickered at the sight, though he wouldn’t ever out loud. The ghost motioned for him to take a seat, so he hung up his cape and put away his sword, and made his way to the red velvet couch. He sat down with a whomp, earning a chuckle from his brother.

“Hey man, it’s alllllll muscle over here”, Techno patted his biceps with a silly smirk. Ghostbur let out a laugh, throwing his head back onto the couch. After a second of laughter, the ghost turned to his brother.

“We need to talk about... Tommy...”.

Techno whipped his head towards Ghostbur, _Well this was unexpected._ The voices re-emerged, seemingly to comment on the situation.

**_“Blood, blood!”_ **  
**_“Oh? What could he possibly want with Tommy?”_ **  
**_“Kill the green bitch, kill him!”_ **  
**_“Poor Tommy...”_ **  
**_“E!”_ **  
**_“shut up i want to listen to this!”_ **

Techno shook his head- he’d deal with them later.

“What about Tommy? I bet he’s happy with his best friend being president and all, being one with that corrupt government.”.

The warrior sent a death glare toward the floorboards. He knew Tommy hated his guts. He tried to show him why he killed Tubbo- but he wouldn’t listen to him. _Of course he wouldn’t fucking listen, he’s just a kid!_

“Uhm... no... actually.”, now it was Ghostburs’ turn to stare at the floor, avoiding his brothers’ confused gaze.

“Tommy-Tommy has been exiled from L’Manburg.”.

—————————————————————

“What?!”. The news hit Techno like a fierce blow to the chest. “Surely Tubbo would’ve-“

“Tubbo was the one to exile him.”

———

 _ **Bam**_ \- Another unexpected blow.

———

“He did so much for that country, he fought so hard for it- why would they dare?” The pink haired man was... angry, to put it lightly. _I tried to fucking warn him. If he had just listened-_ he shook his head - _no, no... not even I expected this. What the hell did he do?_

Like Ghostbur was reading his thoughts, he provided an answer. “He accidentally burned George’s house down.”, Technoblade got even more frustrated at that, that was so.... _minor_! “None of the stuff was damaged either, Tommy managed to get it all out before it burned, but Tubbo said he was a liability to L’Manburg, and exiled him.”.

Techno stood up with a bang, scaring the absolute _shit_ out of his ghostly older brother. He knew there must be more to it than that, but he was already fuming. _How dare Tubbo? Choosing his power over his best friend- over someone who had been by his side for everything. They exiled his little brother for something so small- HOW DARE THEY-_

The younger brother felt a hand placed gently on his shoulder. “Please Techno,”, it was Ghostbur, “Calm down, I know you’re upset but you need to stay calm- i’m not finished.”, the Blood God flopped back onto the couch with a huff, blowing a pink hair out of his face- snatching the blue that Wilbur-( _ **Ghostbur** , the voices had supplied for him_) had kindly handed to him.

This was going to be a very, _very_ long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oop techno do be upset- i don’t blame him, but this isn’t even the worst part- uh oh 👀 
> 
> SORRY THIS IS SO SHORT
> 
> AAAAAA SEE YOU NEXT UPDATE!


	3. Chapter 3: Reunited- but it’s not poggers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so i’m sorry it took me a bit to write this- i’ll update more often i swear i will, it’s just after the 6th I was really debating on abandoning this fic bc canon is DEFINITELY not lining up ;-; But i saw everyone else keeping steady with their focus and decided that fuck it i’m ignoring canon >:) okay so yah- warnings in taggssss

Techno rolled the blue crystal in his hands back and forth, slowly feeling the tension drain from him. Ghostbur provided a soft smile of reassurance.

“Are you ready to keep going Techno?”, Ghostbur said carefully, floating back to the couch. Techno gave a sharp nod, and looked back up at his dead brother. If something bad was happening to Tommy, he needed to hear about it. He hoped that wasn’t the case, a grimace flashing on his face. Suddenly, the voices started _booming_. Like they were on some sort of megaphone- Techno tried as hard as he could not to clench his head in his hands, gripping the crystal tighter instead.

**_ “Help Tommy!” _ **

**_ “Save the raccoon boi” _ **

**_ “e” _ **

**_ “TECHNO OPEN THE DOOR??” _ **

He rarely ever listened to the voices, but today they sounded _deathly_ urgent. Techno made his way to the door, setting the blue on the table as he walked past. Ghostbur floated behind carefully at a distance, humming in confusion. Just as he put his hand on the doorknob, the wooden door was thrust open in urgency. Techno took a step back to observe the scene.

It was Tubbo, of all people. Tears streaming down his paled face. Blood coating his arms as he struggled to find a breath. The pink haired tyrant took a look at the younger boy, there didn’t seem to be any kind of injuries on him, so Techno assumed it was whoever he had is his arms’ blood. 

“Why the heck are you here?” Techno snarled, his monotone voice covering the concern in his voice. Tubbo let out a shakysob, hold out the person in his arms. “Please-please help him-“ the brunette let out a hiccup, and Techno pet a little of the concern slip through in his gaze. Ghostbur floated closer to Tubbo and let out a horrified gasp- frozen in place.

“H-he hit the water slightly while he was falling- i tried to catch him pleasetechno _please help_ _him_ -“, the president was shaking like a leaf, trying to hold back more tears and ultimately failing. The piglin hybrid reached forwards cautiously and grabbed hold of the unidentified teen. Techno took a closer look at the kid he was holding and-

“ _oh my gods-_ “

_** “what the hell?!” ** _

_** “HELP HIM!” ** _

_** “E E E E E” ** _

_** “holy shit tommy-“ ** _

_** “DID HE ACTUALLY DO THAT?!” ** _

Techno tried to speak, but he choked on his words. He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t think. Tommy, his youngest brother, was sprawled out unconscious and bloody in his arms. The voices were so loud- why cant they just shut up, shut up, _shutupshutUPSHUTUP_ -

**“HELP HIM NOW!!** ” 

The voices screamed in unison. They rarely ever agree on something, but today was an exception. The hybrid shook his head, _Ive got to help him or he won’t live._ He started inspecting his brother gently as he rested him on his couch.

His right leg was twisted in an awkward fashion, _definitely broken,_ Techno thought. Blood streamed sluggishly down his forehead and arms, small, shallow cuts littering his face- and seemingly old cuts re-opened on his arms. Techno sucked in a breath. _Those don’t look like they were from branches_. He exhaled shakily. _We can deal with that later_. His clothes were torn, burnt and shred, covered in a layer of grime. Bruises in different, very worrying shades of yellow and purple and a large gash going straight through his stomach. 

Tubbo was still frozen by the door, Ghostbur rubbing his back in circles as he sobbed violently. Techno looked back at his broken and battered brother.

_ It’s going to be a longer night then i thought, I’ve got some work to do. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was this short? I feel like these are getting shorter- i’m sorry :( I’ll try my hardest to start writing more tho!!! >:D luv y’all!


	4. Chapter 4: There’s a Reason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for Jubilee Line- i know some people are triggered by this song- and it’s not in the tags (most of the warnings are), so skip this chapter if that’s the case.
> 
> i recommend playing the song at the part it comes up for full effect- I totally wrote this while listening to Jubilee Line on repeat. Ily guys <3

_** 1 1/2 Weeks Before Tubbos’ Visit ** _

Tommy stood idle on the cold obsidian bridge; it was a stark contrast to the rest of the red and oranges that surrounded him. Heat from the lava lake below rose up and warmed the shivering boy while bubbling ominously below. The teen did not move; he was lost in thought, staring out into space while clutching his dirtied bandana.

Unbeknownst to him, a certain ghost was watching, transparently, next to him. Schlatt- _Glatt_? He didn’t know at this point, but he wasn’t worried about that. He needed to help this kid, this teenager, who had been put through wars, manipulation, loss, death, abandonment, abuse, exile- a child (“ _IM NOT A CHILD!!_ ” Tommy would’ve protested, Schlatt chuckled silently at the image.) had been put through so much, with no help- no support. No one to talk to him or keep him company during the nights he cried himself tired, the nights he... he hurt himself. the ghost grimaced and shook his head, putting it in his hands. He didn’t need to be thinking about the past right now. He needed to help Tommy in the present. He let his arms fall to his sides.

That was going to be a problem, since Dream had forbidden Schlatt to have any contact with anyone outside of L’Manburg, or lives would be taken from his former friends. Dream wasn’t here today, but no doubt if he showed in front of the blonde, he would believe he was another hallucination and tell Dream about it. 

Schlatt took a seat on the edge of the bridge, right next to where the young boy was standing. He sighed heavily. The goat hybrid was never good with emotions- in fact, it seemed he was very emotionally stunted in his last life. Drinking away his problems and throwing people out of countries- Schlatt cringed -that wasn’t his best move ever, it led to poor Wilbur blowing up his country, and manipulatinghis brother along the way. Schlatt knew Tommy forgave him though, it wasn’t his fault after all. He looked up at the zoned out kid. That’s just how Tommy was- so selfless, _too selfless really._

The ghost was pulled out of his thoughts when he saw Tommy move out of the corner of his vision. Schlatt tensed up, ready to grab him if he tried anything- but to his surprise, ( _and relief_ ), the blonde sat down next to him. He relaxed after a minute, when he was sure the kid wouldn’t try anything. Tommy suddenly went into his inventory and grabbed something from it, bringing it out. 

_A guitar_? Schlatt didn’t know the kid could play- it looked vaguely familiar; he’d definitely seen it somewhere before, but he couldn’t piece together where it was from. Tommy started strumming lightly, which gave the goat hybrid another sense of familiarity. He knew where that song was from- he’d heard Ghostbur hum it sometimes. Whenever he asked the ghostly man though, he never got a clear answer. He couldn’t seem to remember it correctly.

_“Ah well!- I think... Uhm...”, Ghostbur tapped his chin thoughtfully, swinging the axe he was holding through the air. He suddenly stopped short. “Oh yeah! I uh.._. _i think i wrote it?~ It was called Jubilee... Jubilee- jubil.... uhm, I’m sorry, i can’t remember!”, the young ghost frowned in defea_ t. _“Maybe it wasn’t a very happy song then...”. He turned back to fidgeting with his axe, and when Schlatt had asked later, **Ghostbur couldn’t seem to remember what they were talking about.**_

Schlatt looked over at Tommy, listening to him play the guitar gracefully as he sung.

_ Wasting your time... _

_ You're wasting mine _

_ I hate to see you leaving- _

_ A fate worse than dying _

Schlatt sucked in a breath- this song was definitely written by Wilbur. The ghost didn’t know what it was about though, and he wasn’t going to interrupt Tommy to find out, so he kept listening carefully.

_ Your city gave me asthma _

_  
So that's why I'm fucking leaving _

_  
And your water gave me cancer _

_ And the pavement hurt my feelings _

_ Shout at the wall _

_  
'Cause the walls don't fucking love you _

  
_Shout at the wall..._

_  
'Cause the walls don't fucking love you... _

Tommys’ strumming got louder, a contrast from the gentle tone at the beginning. Schlatts’ expression softened at the words. He would never admit it, but he just wanted to give the tired kid a giant hug, and tell him everything would be okay. The ghost squeezed his hands on the edge of the bridge. _If only fucking Dream didn’t make that stupid rule._ He was going to show himself to the boy at one point, Schlatt knew- but he needed to find a way to keep it secret from the devil himself. For now, he would listen to the exiled teen sing, he really did have a wonderful voice- Schlatt only wished there were more people around to tell him that.

_ There's a reason- _

_  
That London puts barriers on the tube line _

_  
There's a reason... _

  
_That London puts barriers on the rails_

_  
There's a reason! _

_  
That London puts barriers on the tube line _

_  
There's a reason- _

_  
That London puts barriers on the rails _

  
There's a reason...

  
_That London puts barriers on the tube line_

_ There's a reason- _

_ They fail.... _

**_ They sat there for the rest of the night, taking in the beauty of the nether silently. _ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this me venting through Tommy? yeah- yeah maybe it is. >:(
> 
> what are you gonna do about it? /hj
> 
> Again ILY GUYS TYSM FOR READING!!! :D/gen

**Author's Note:**

> so
> 
> yeah
> 
> cliffhanger bitches!!
> 
> okay so uh- until next time pogchamps, watch tommys streams ffs and don’t accidentally miss them like i did 
> 
> Oh btw there WILL BE AN UPDATE I just don’t know how to change the amount of chapters i’m sorry


End file.
